Week 33. Validation

This week I found myself frustrated for not getting attention from another person who I wanted to speak to and get to know better. The person was not someone of great importance in my life, a stranger. Although what surprised me was the fact that I was putting so much importance and value in the opinion or attention of someone who I don't know that well and who does not know me at all. This was not the first time I've had this kind of feeling so I started questioning why I already have a habit of putting my trust and a sense of validation outside of myself? I will not go into detail where this comes from, so let’s jump into solution finding mode, shall we?

It is great to notice when we put trust outside of ourselves and evaluate if we do this using discernment or out of habit. When we have a clear answer to that we can move on to the next question, and this might be a challenging one: why don’t we trust ourselves enough and feel the need to outsource the credibility and validation? The answer to this one usually pops up instantly but if not, I encourage you to sit with it for a bit, to get comfortable in asking these uncomfortable, revealing questions, in your own privacy. When we find an answer to this one, then it’s action time: let’s find ways to return our own trustworthiness. The actions required will most probably be related to the answer you got to the second question, individual. Starting this week we can begin to build our own inner trustworthiness and validation (in line with moral virtues and humanity, of course) and we can commit to weave the actions that strengthen this foundation into each of our weeks because just like in home making, trust is built by consistently adding blocks to create a sturdy structure. By trusting ourselves we can stand more firmly on our own two feet in the world, not waver and tremble in anxiousness if we meet someone with another worldview, principles or preferences, rather we then can accept the differences and move along our own path.

Self-trust is a skill we can develop. It’s one that is not often discussed or drawn attention to but my goal is to remind you that no matter where you are in life, at any given moment you can decide to choose differently, to turn your life around, learn new skill set of life, make it the way you want it, to grow and blossom.

Have a beautiful week moving in self-trust.